Apartment 643 (part 2)

During my year playing ball in Hickory, one of my two roommates was a kid who’d been drafted out of high school. Name: Slater Hughes. Position: 1st base. His mother controlled his entire life so he never had one. She not only came with him to Hickory, but she stayed in our apartment for a … Continue reading Apartment 643 (part 2) →

The Manny Machado Trade

So the thing they couldn’t stop talking about during the All Star game (told you the game was boring!) finally happened yesterday: Manny Machado has become a Dodger. If you trust lameass Twitter, Justin Turner and Alex Wood are all excited about it. They look all spontaneous about it too. Real spontaneous. Ok, so first thing … Continue reading The Manny Machado Trade →

Home Run Derby

I’m not a big fan of the All Star game (who is?). If you ask me, the best part of last night’s game was having Mike Trout miked up when he was supposed to be fielding. I guess it’s an honor to be picked for an All Star game, but I always wonder how many … Continue reading Home Run Derby →

Joyce Gets Caught (big deal)

So meanwhile what’s been going on with Joyce? I’ve been seeing her a couple times a week lately. We go out to dinner then we go back to her house… No, it’s not like with Monica. (I don’t have to pay for dinner for starters lol.) When we get to her house, Joyce goes in … Continue reading Joyce Gets Caught (big deal) →

Block Burgers for the 4th of July

July 4th back home was always a big deal. I told y’all that Dad was in the army, so respect for our country was something we all grew up with. You put down your drink, put your ball cap over your heart and stood up straight when they sang the National Anthem before a Smokies … Continue reading Block Burgers for the 4th of July →

Bigass Watches and the Men That Wear Them

So y’all remember how Monica’s sister’s Persian fake boyfriend had this bigass watch…and made sure I saw it? A couple dudes came into the store this week, both of them with bigass watches, and both of them comparing them and what they cost. If you ask me it was like two gay guys comparing how … Continue reading Bigass Watches and the Men That Wear Them →

Saturday Night with Monica (part 3)

After Keaton scared the shit out of the bitchass Mexican dude who was trying to start a fight outside of the bar he works at, the totally hot chick bartender who was watching from the doorway hollered “last call!”. I headed for the entrance and passed Miguel and Keaton. Miguel fist-bumped me. Keaton still hadn’t … Continue reading Saturday Night with Monica (part 3) →

Saturday Night with Monica (part 1)

I'm not sure, but I may have given y’all the impression that, since I’ve woken up in Joyce’s bed, Monica’s out of the picture. She isn’t. We’re still having the same one dinner/Netflix/sex night a week we’ve been having for a long time, and I reckon it works. (It’d work better if I didn’t have … Continue reading Saturday Night with Monica (part 1) →

Fathers Day (part 2)

I thought I was just going to write a few things about my Dad and then I guess I got kinda carried away. I split what I wrote into two parts, and I think you need to read the first one to understand what I'm going to say about Dad here. It comes down to … Continue reading Fathers Day (part 2) →

Dinner at Joyce’s (part 2)

So Joyce had served me the appetizer of the three course dinner she had cooked for me when I went over to have her put the sim card from my old phone into the new iPhone X she’d bought me. We were in the dining room by candlelight, and I could tell that it was … Continue reading Dinner at Joyce’s (part 2) →